Time To Make The Doughnuts

I'm sitting here just staring at my computer screen trying to come up with something to blog. Nothing really funny going on, just trying to survive life. Thought I would take this moment to just kick around a little of what God's been challenging me on lately.

Believe me, the list is very long so I'll just pick a few.

A little more than a month ago I was reading where Jesus came to give us life more abundantly. I remember telling God if this is the abundant life then it sucks. Clearly this ain't it and where could I find it? I got to thinking about why I was feeling so down. The more I thought about it the worse I felt. I looked at the to do list and everything had turned into an obligation. It was enough for me to want to crawl back to bed and pull the covers over my head.

I was feeling abundance alright just not in a good way!

I pulled out my trusty, and at this point dusty, journal and just dumped it all out there for God. I felt a huge load being lifted. In my prayer time I felt like my to do list was crowding out my time with God. That spending time with Him was regulated to another check on the list rather than the source that I need. Desperately need.

I was reading in Acts the other day. What jumped out at me was that they served out of their love for God. I had to re-read that a few times. I've felt like I've been dragging through the list - time to make the doughnuts and there has been no joy in that.

I kept thinking about it.

How were they able to handle being in each others mess without getting distracted, to keep their family life in check, and to serve out of their love for God without it being an obligation? Again - they served out of their love for God.

My love-o-meter has been on the dry side. Do I love God - absolutely. Am I receiving God's love - what the heck does that mean? And if I answer a question with a question than I'm thinking the answer is a big ol' no.

What does that mean to you? How do you receive God's love? Do you know, as Romans says, the height, the depth, the width of His love - for you? I don't, at least not fully, or I wouldn't be dragging my face through the oatmeal of life. Sadly, I'm quick to point the finger and I'm constantly asking why and show me first before I move.

So to come back around, to have that abundant life, that peace, all I need to do is receive it. How I receive it will reflect how much time I put in to it. Am I putting Him first? Am I boldly going after it? I have been working on that one! I didn't say successfully but I'm working on it.

I've also found that God's list and my list are two very different things. Again, it comes down to balance. Nothing could be further from my personality. I don't do balance - it's not in my nature!

And oh how interesting the things that want to distract me!

I try to sit and pray but I feel the need to jump up and go shovel the dishes out of the sink. Which is odd as I was neglecting them quite nicely until that very moment. Try to read a (gasp!) non-fiction book and suddenly the dust bunnies mutate into tumbleweeds. And we won't discuss the gang colors the laundry has been sportin' lately because I have no clue what that means.

This makes me rather suspicious of the list when I peer closer at it and it's time that is my nemesis. Time to get it all done.

"Seek ye first the kingdom of God and all these things will be added to you." Matt 6:33

I'm trying to tithe my time so to speak. I'm giving Him my first thing in the morning - no matter what time that may be and trusting Him to bless my time whether it's work or play. Found out He told me to play a little bit more, to relax, and stop worrying about stuff.

Who knew the whole spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down had some truth to it? And before we rail on sugar - God made it so nanner nanner.

Oh thank you Lord for the crack known as shug-gah. Although I don't think He meant I can have that in abundance. Unless it's wrapped in chocolate. Hallelujah, Amen!